I think the real question here is… why don’t I write? I’ve seen a lot of authors answer this question by saying they wanted to send a message, make a point, or change something in society. Which is amazing.
But my main reason is that I enjoy telling stories. I always have. I love creating new worlds and characters, writing descriptions that can paint a picture or inspire a certain emotion.
I get very attached to my own characters, too. They have their own voices, personalities, and I can see them – everything – vividly while I write, as if the book is a movie in my head and I need to somehow translate these images onto paper. I feel like there’s a part of myself in each character I create, even the villains, and I love making them complex, figuring out their backstories, and how their relationships develop as the story goes on.
I write because it kind of gets me through life. I can use it to escape into another world for a few hours, and get away from stress. Coming back to the characters after a while feels like meeting up with friends you haven’t seen for months. It’s the same as getting lost in one of your favourite books, only this one is mine. I make the rules.
I hope I can make someone feel the way I feel about my book. I want someone to read it and feel excited or nervous during an action scene the same way my heart pounded when I wrote it. My dream is for someone to read my novel and tell me their life has been changed for the better by my story, or that a certain scene moved them, or they’re in love with the characters.
I want it to be a comfort and an escape for someone else the same way it is for me while I’m writing it.
I honestly think that I put a piece of my heart and soul (ha, that’s ironic) inside the book when I write. When showing it to other people I feel vulnerable, like my secrets have been laid bare and someone’s going to find out something important about me by reading. Which is strange to think, because I’m not writing as myself in my books – it’s the characters’ voices, not mine. It’s weird how personal books can be, despite fantasy being so far removed from my everyday life.
I’m drawn to fantasy and historical fiction. Stories that challenge the norm, stories that pitch you into new worlds and surround you with the impossible. Who needs real life when you have magic? I love exploring these sorts of worlds as I write and describe. I love creating complex characters, delving into their emotions and their motives. When I write, I’m going on the journey with these characters. Sometimes I’m discovering things at the same time they are. Writing can be intense and emotional and it can seem worthless sometimes when you don’t get anything from your efforts, but I’m trying. And I’ll never give up. Ever.
I also feel emotions very keenly when I write. There’s one line in Soul Seeker that I wrote, in the middle of a very highly-strung, emotionally charged scene – and I typed the full stop, read it back to myself, and the impact hit me like a ton of bricks. I really felt what this one particular character was realising in that moment – part of his life had just crumbled around him. It felt like it had just happened to me, not him!
That being said, although I feel pained and I tend to laugh out loud at my characters’ sarcastic comments or jokes (please don’t judge me), I’ve never cried while writing a scene. I’ve come close, once. But we’ll see… I have a few heartbreaking scenes planned later on in the Soul Seeker Series…